Men strike back

Before anyone accuses me of being a sexist pig, this email was sent to me by a friend and since there are so many emails out there insulting men I thought this was quite funny.

How many men does it take to open a beer?None. It should be opened when she brings it.

Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.

Why do women have smaller feet than men?It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allowsthem to stand closer to the kitchen sink.

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me.."

How do you fix a woman's watch?You don't. There is a clock on the oven.

Why do men fart more than women?Because women can't shut up long enough tobuild up the required pressure.

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.

What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?A woman who won't do what she's told.

Scientists have discovered a food that diminishesa woman's sex drive by 90%.It's called a Wedding Cake.

Women will never be equal to men until they canwalk down the street with a bald head and a beergut, and still think they are sexy.

In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.Then God created Man and rested.Then God created Woman.Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.